me: Remembers every date when a movie/book comes out in every country
me: Can't remember a single History date
“Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.”
LISTEN UP YOU LITTLE SHITS
he doesn’t just want to get to the other side of the road
he wants to get to
the other side
the motherfucking chicken is suicidal
oh my fuck MY LIFE IS A LIE
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
